The Television Test Card
Has watching 'Life On Mars' left you pining for the good old days of television;
- Nothing but static for more than 14 hours a day
- A mind boggling three channels to choose from?
- Only two (short) advert breaks in an hour long programme?
- The classic BBC Television test card?
What do we have now? 24 hour television, more channels than you could ever watch, whole channels full of adverts and no test cards.
Well Fret No More! I might not be able to help you with most of that but if you really do miss the test card I can certainly help you out because hidden away deep in the bowels of digital television is that old classic from the BBC.
How To Do It...Here's what you have to do. Make sure you read the following instructions carefully, follow them closely and satisfaction will be guaranteed.
- Tune to BBC Red Button (105) and wait for the picture to appear
- Within 30 seconds press the Yellow button
- Tune away from BBC Red Button (any channel will do)
- Tune back to BBC Red Button (105) and wait for the picture to appear
- Within 30 seconds press the Green button. The Status page will appear (interesting in itself)
- Press the Green button again and wait 30 seconds
- Da Da!
And there you have it, the Freeview Widescreen version of the classic BBC TV Test Card (F) in black, white, grey and - right in the middle - in glorious technicolour, complete with blackboard and chalk is that blonde haired, blue eyed little girl with her creepy clown and their never ending game of noughts and crosses.
Sadly, there's no 'finger on the wine glass' whistle to go with it but I guess you can't have it all.
Something For The Anoraks
If you have enjoyed my little detour into the past and actually find television test cards interesting (or even exciting) you might like to check you're alone, pull the curtains, close the door, dim the lights and tippy toe over to the Test Card Gallery at http://www.meldrum.co.uk/mhp/testcard/ where you can indulge yourself more fully...