Being a female, I can try to offer my advice to anyone who wants to break up with their girlfriend, of course there is no perfect way. But you can at least try to make as painless as possible.
If it happens that the both of you know what's coming then fine, that makes it easy. One of you just needs to break the ice.
If you're girlfriend is all loved up, and sees great things evolving from your relationship but you don't, use the following tips to make the break up as painless as possible:
- Avoid at all cost breaking up with them via text, email, if you absolutely have to break up with your girlfriend but cannot meet up with her, do it over the phone. The fact that you make an effort to see her, means that you are not a coward, that you are serious about the breakup.
- Also plan a meeting, don't call it a date, just simply meet up with her, make sure that she will be reasonably openminded, so don't break the news if you know that her grandma has just passed away or that she has lost her job. You don't want to add further sorrow to the ones she already has. Wait a while till she is reasonably okay and no longer upset.
- Avoid using the closing sentence that "we should just be friends", it is pathetic and the last thing a person who has been heartbroken wants to do is to have a constant reminder of their loss.
- Have good reasons, and don't like. Don't use the "It's not you, it's me" or the "You deserve someone better than me." It will only make her angry.
What to try and do:
- Avoid smirking or smiling when you use your excuse (which is hopefully not one of the ones I listed above as ones to avoid).
- Avoid holding her hand or hugging her, it just makes letting you go harder to do.
- Stand a feet back from her, and just honestly and sincerely explain the situation. It is not that she is a bad person or that you are, it's that you don't want to kid yourself any longer and don't want to see her getting hurt ( that is if she isn't already).
- Stand your ground, if she cries or starts begging you, don't slip back into, the "Maybe we should try it again" situation.
Hopefully, your girlfriend is understanding and is NOT holding a vase or fork in her hand then it should be reasonably fine.
I hope you have found this helpful even if just slightly.
How to Break up with your girfriend.
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31 July 2006
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