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Deep Secrets: Boys' Friendships and the Crisis of Conn... by Way, Niobe Hardback
FREE US DELIVERY | ISBN: 0674046641 | Quality Books
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eBay item number:386988994384
Item specifics
- Condition
- ISBN
- 0674046641
- EAN
- 9780674046641
- Publication Name
- N/A
- Type
- Hardback
- Release Title
- Deep Secrets: Boys' Friendships and the Crisis of Connection
- Artist
- Way, Niobe
- Brand
- N/A
- Colour
- N/A
- Book Title
- Deep Secrets : Boys' Friendships and the Crisis of Connection
- Item Length
- 8.6in
- Publisher
- Harvard University Press
- Publication Year
- 2011
- Format
- Hardcover
- Language
- English
- Item Height
- 1.1in
- Genre
- Family & Relationships, Psychology
- Topic
- Friendship, Developmental / Adolescent, Developmental / Child, Social Psychology
- Item Width
- 6.2in
- Item Weight
- 17.8 Oz
- Number of Pages
- 336 Pages
About this product
Product Information
"Boys are emotionally illiterate and don't want intimate friendships." In this empirically grounded challenge to our stereotypes about boys and men, Niobe Way reveals the intense intimacy among teenage boys especially during early and middle adolescence. Boys not only share their deepest secrets and feelings with their closest male friends, they claim that without them they would go "wacko." Yet as boys become men, they become distrustful, lose these friendships, and feel isolated and alone. Drawing from hundreds of interviews conducted throughout adolescence with black, Latino, white, and Asian American boys, Deep Secrets reveals the ways in which we have been telling ourselves a false story about boys, friendships, and human nature. Boys' descriptions of their male friendships sound more like "something out of Love Story than Lord of the Flies." Yet in late adolescence, boys feel they have to "man up" by becoming stoic and independent. Vulnerable emotions and intimate friendships are for girls and gay men. "No homo" becomes their mantra. These findings are alarming, given what we know about links between friendships and health, and even longevity. Rather than a "boy crisis" Way argues that boys are experiencing a "crisis of connection" because they live in a culture where human needs and capacities are given a sex (female) and a sexuality (gay), and thus discouraged for those who are neither. Way argues that the solution lies with exposing the inaccuracies of our gender stereotypes and fostering these critical relationships and fundamental human skills.
Product Identifiers
Publisher
Harvard University Press
ISBN-10
0674046641
ISBN-13
9780674046641
eBay Product ID (ePID)
99514640
Product Key Features
Book Title
Deep Secrets : Boys' Friendships and the Crisis of Connection
Format
Hardcover
Language
English
Topic
Friendship, Developmental / Adolescent, Developmental / Child, Social Psychology
Publication Year
2011
Genre
Family & Relationships, Psychology
Number of Pages
336 Pages
Dimensions
Item Length
8.6in
Item Height
1.1in
Item Width
6.2in
Item Weight
17.8 Oz
Additional Product Features
Lc Classification Number
Bf575.F66w39 2011
Reviews
[ Deep Secrets ] offers a surprising glimpse into the hearts of American boys, revealing a group of lonely young men who crave acceptance and belonging and deeply miss the friendships of their childhood...Compulsively readable...Way recounts the hundreds of interviews her team conducted in American high schools. The voices present are heartbreakingly authentic in revealing a pattern, a gradual drift away from "emotionally intimate same-sex friendships" with other boys and toward a destructive stereotype of manliness that perpetuate the false notion that "boys are only interested in one thing.", Way's book should provide encouragement to parents wondering whether they are setting their children, especially their sons, up for abuse by encouraging closeness and defiance of gender stereotypes, particularly those concerning close same-sex friends. Way asserts that the need and ability for connection is as keen in boys as it is in girls, and she backs up her assertion with plenty of data and close reading of the literature. Connection is not something one needs to teach, as the author so eloquently demonstrates; it is something one needs to foster. The text is beautifully written, and the boys' stories are interspersed with explanations and discussion substantiated by the literature. A truly approachable piece of work for a wide audience., [ Deep Secrets ] offers a surprising glimpse into the hearts of American boys, revealing a group of lonely young men who crave acceptance and belonging and deeply miss the friendships of their childhood...Compulsively readable...Way recounts the hundreds of interviews her team conducted in American high schools. The voices present are heartbreakingly authentic in revealing a pattern, a gradual drift away from "emotionally intimate same-sex friendships" with other boys and toward a destructive stereotype of manliness that perpetuate the false notion that "boys are only interested in one thing." -- Publishers Weekly (starred review) The stories that Way and her research team have persuaded boys to tell are a welcome corrective to the stereotyping of males as essentially unfeeling and/or incapable of communicating their feelings, which has been such a striking (and offensive) feature of recent discourse on gender differences. Way deserves our gratitude for bringing to the surface what seems lately to have become the deepest secret of all: that the needs, desires and feelings of boys and girls, or men and women, are at bottom far more similar than different. -- Deborah Cameron Times Higher Education Way''s book should provide encouragement to parents wondering whether they are setting their children, especially their sons, up for abuse by encouraging closeness and defiance of gender stereotypes, particularly those concerning close same-sex friends. Way asserts that the need and ability for connection is as keen in boys as it is in girls, and she backs up her assertion with plenty of data and close reading of the literature. Connection is not something one needs to teach, as the author so eloquently demonstrates; it is something one needs to foster. The text is beautifully written, and the boys'' stories are interspersed with explanations and discussion substantiated by the literature. A truly approachable piece of work for a wide audience. -- J. F. Heberle Choice Deep Secrets tells a story of American teenagers in baggy jeans and T-shirts, with a basketball under the arm, expressing extraordinary sensitivity and tenderness about their same-sex friends, and expecting the same in return. The disappearance of this gentle world, it seems, scars them for life, and appears to do extensive damage to the culture at large... In short, this is an extremely important book, a revelation in a way, and one of the most absorbing academic publications I''ve ever had the privilege of reading. -- Bradley Winterton Taipei Times In Way''s groundbreaking Deep Secrets , boys who have long been obscured by cultural myths come alive and let us all in on their most promising, most human dimensions. This is a book that should start educators and parents rethinking how we support our sons'' lives. -- Michael C. Reichert, coauthor of Reaching Boys, Teaching Boys The book that changes the discussion about boys. Let the secret out! -- Michael Kaufman, author of Cracking the Armour: Power, Pain, and the Lives of Men Deep Secrets is a much needed and insightful book. Niobe Way rescues us from the simplistic view that ''boys will be boys'' to reveal the depth of boys'' emotional lives. From her careful and extensive research over two decades comes a compelling and memorable portrait of real boys'' lives. -- Gary Barker, author of Dying to Be Men: Youth, Masculinity, and Social Exclusion Way''s moving analysis of the intimate lives of boys challenges the reader to reconsider many of the widely held assumptions about what it means to grow up male in America today. By sharing their stories of loss, their fears of rejection, their hopes and dreams of connection, Way introduces us to the world of adolescent males so that we can see them as they are and not as we may have imagined. -- Pedro A. Noguera, author of The Trouble with Black Boys, Deep Secrets tells a story of American teenagers in baggy jeans and T-shirts, with a basketball under the arm, expressing extraordinary sensitivity and tenderness about their same-sex friends, and expecting the same in return. The disappearance of this gentle world, it seems, scars them for life, and appears to do extensive damage to the culture at large... In short, this is an extremely important book, a revelation in a way, and one of the most absorbing academic publications I've ever had the privilege of reading., The stories that Way and her research team have persuaded boys to tell are a welcome corrective to the stereotyping of males as essentially unfeeling and/or incapable of communicating their feelings, which has been such a striking (and offensive) feature of recent discourse on gender differences. Way deserves our gratitude for bringing to the surface what seems lately to have become the deepest secret of all: that the needs, desires and feelings of boys and girls, or men and women, are at bottom far more similar than different.
Table of Content
Contents 1. The Hidden Landscape of Boys' Friendships 2. Investigating Boys, Friendships, and Human Nature Part I: Friendships during Early and Middle Adolescence 3. "Sometimes You Need to Spill Your Heart Out to Somebody" 4. Boys with Feelings 5. Nick and George: Stories of Resistance Part II: Friendships during Late Adolescence 6. "When You Grow Up, Your Heart Dies" 7. As Boys Become Men 8. Fernando and Danny 9. The Crisis of Connection Notes Acknowledgments Index
Copyright Date
2013
Lccn
2010-047702
Dewey Decimal
155.5/32
Intended Audience
Trade
Dewey Edition
22
Item description from the seller
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