This book has changed my life!! I believe that as far as Narcissism is concerned, people can be on either end of the spectrum, or indeed, anywhere in between. Obviously, the author's mother was at the worst end of the spectrum and this often made me wonder whether I was being unfair as labeling my mother as a Narcissist. But no! I would recommend readers to take from the book whatever advice suites their particular situation. Understanding that the condition is incurable and that these people cannot change certainly makes one view things from a new perspective. Reading about the behaviours and mindset of a Narcissist was a revelation to me. It made total sense of the hell I have endured for most of my life and I cried with relief, just knowing that it wasn't just me always being stupid/unreasonable etc. etc. Read full review
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My mother has always been quite selfish, every single conversation I have/have had with her she turns it onto herself with no interest in what I'm saying. The majority of my life I've been made to feel quite insignificant and ignored. Turns out it wasn't just selfishness. After watching Sopranos I discovered it was actually narcissism and a lot more toxic than I ever really realised. I'm half way through this book and it's been a realisation to say the least. It's very surreal to read this book and know that the author has never met my mother yet she describes her flawlessly, & our relationship also. My father is an enabler, I always thought he was just spineless while she was an ultimate diva, stamping her feet, bullying when she didn't get what she wanted. This book is enlightening. Empowering. Healing. Surreal. Painful. Can't recommend it enough. Only problem I have is I wish I discovered this book sooner.Read full review
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This book is written in such a clear and interesting manner, I was totally engrossed. It identifies the characteristics and behaviours of the Narcissist and the lasting impact it has on you. When you can do nothing to please your mother, no matter how hard you try, it is understandable that you think it is your fault. After all, that is what she will be telling you as often as she can, in many ways. Imagine then, the liberation of being given a book that shows you that it's not you, it's her! It shocked me to find myself and my mother described on every page, and it saddened me to learn that it will never change. Except that it has, now I understand her rules I can choose whether to play by them or not. This is a personality disorder which I somehow find more able to forgive, and which can be quite amusing to watch now that I feel myself absolved, and perhaps distanced from the manipulations. That said this is a toxic situation that has had lasting impact on my childhood and adult life; I am now in my 50's. I wish I had this information 40 years ago. The book also explains the use of EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) I am so impressed that I have recommended it to a friend and sent a copy to my sister. Of course not all Narcissists are women, and this book also helped me to realise that I had repeated my experiences of inadequacy with my first husband too. Between the two of them I have needed counselling and psychiatric help throughout adulthood. Thanks to this book I am finally free. Read full review
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This is for sure 1 of the best books i have ever read on the very important topic of Narcissistic Mothers, and I have read plenty of book since starting to researching my own family history (my mom-ster) in particularly back in 2012. It's amazing and empowering to know that I am not alone in this surreal experience of being raised by a hellish woman, an enabler father, and everything in between when it comes to being born and raised in a TOXIC DEMENTED family like i did! For many and many years i didn't know what was "wrong" with me, since everything i did, pay, bought, said to her wasn't ever enough, i could never please her, and it took me to start learning and understanding what the name was all along: narcissism, most precisely NARCISSISTIC MOTHER, and by then, I was in my early 50s, and things became very clear then, and I haven't stopped learning, understanding and researching since then. I went TOTAL NO CONTACT approx 9 happy years ago, and of course that with that, i "lost" all the family members, sisters, aunts, cousins, nieces, etc, etc, etc, all her flying monkeys that were never good or truthful to me or my son anyway, they have hated me from the very beginning, and i don't miss anyone, and I will NEVER go back! This book was written intelligently, with a huge piece of her own heart and experience of an also survivor of these demons called "mothers", and is truly a must read for anyone searching for answers and clarity on this dark subject!Read full review
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I have a mother with npd and I could have written this book myself, made me gasp in places. I thought I was alone and nobody else understood until I read this. Thank you, it’s my bible x
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