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Accidental Bond: How Sibling Connections Influence Adult Relationships by Susan Merrell (Paperback, 1997)

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CHAPTER ONE The Accidental Bond We do not select our beginnings. At birth, a child"s world is given to him; the lessons of acting, reacting, and interacting will be learned with a certain set of parents, siblings, and others.

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A fascinating and informative read. *The Boston Globe A RICH SOURCE OF FASCINATING MATERIAL about the complex realities of siblinghood and a valuable commentary on the impact that these little-studied relationships have upon our lives. *The New Republic Many books have attempted to tackle the complex theme of sibling connection. But rather than look at the minutae of these relationships, journalist Susan Scarf Merrell examines the big issues that all siblings wrestle with in their own unique ways *in particular the Three Cs: Competition, Cooperation, and Comparison. What she discovered was that no matter what kind of relationship we now have with our siblings *close or distant, loving or hostile *our histories with them exert a profound effect on our current relationship with lovers, friends, coworkers, and our own children. Drawing on the most current research; the work of psychologists, psychiatrists, and family experts; and stories from brothers and sisters themselves, Merrell illustrates that through siblings, we come to know both the worst and the very best that lurks within each of us. Susan Merrell brilliantly illuminates how the peculiar mix of biology, history, and intimacy makes our attachments to siblings so essential to knowing ourselves. *Mary Kay Blakely Author of American Mom