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Playing the Moldovans at Tennis by Tony Hawks (Cassette, 2000)

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September 1997. Tony Hawks and Arthur Smith are watching the football round at Tony's house, England are playing Moldova in the World Cup qualifiers and winning easily. The conversation, oddly, turns to Tennis, which Arthur has always asserted is a 'crap game', especially after Tony beat him at it on holiday in Majorca, easily. A pedantic argurment unsues, Tony believing that even a 'natural sportsman or sportswman' couldn't be good at tennis without proper tuition. Arthur vowing that most natural sportsmen (like the footballers on the telly) could pick up a racket and, without too much bother, play a good game, in fact, they could beat Tony (ex Susses Junior champion, former Equity Knockout winner). And so a childish bet was proffered that Tony couldn't play all of the Moldovan national football team at tennis (I believe a hundred pounds is sufficient to get you doing these kinds of things) and beath them all. I could, I could beat them all, said Tony. Not every single one of them, taunted his friend. Conspiratorially, one of them is bound to be very good. A further carrot was clearly needed: Look, if you beat them all then I'll stand naked on Balham High Street and sing the Moldovan national Anthem.