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The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John M. Gottman, Nan Silver, John Gottmann (Hardcover, 1999)

World of Books Ltd (10284775)

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Just as Masters and Johnson pioneered the study of human sexuality so John Gottman - author of the much-praised Why Marriages Succeed or Fail and director of the Seattle Marital and Family Institute - has revolutionized the study of marriage. Gottman has found, through questioning hundreds of couples in his 'love lab', that it only takes five minutes for him to predict ' with 91 per cent accuracy ' which couples will eventually divorce. He says marriages are threatened not by anger, as many popular therapies suggest, but by what he calls the real demons, 'The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse'- Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness and Stonewalling. In The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work Gottman guides couples on the path towards a harmonious and long-lasting relationship. His principles teach partners new and sometimes startling strategies for making a marriage work. Concentrating on Work, Children, Money, Sex and Stress, Gottman first helps couples focus on each other, paying attention to the small day-to-day moments that, strung together, make up the heart and soul of any relationship. Being thoughtful about ordinary matters provides spouses with a solid foundation for resolving conflict and finding strategies for living with those issues that cannot be resolved. The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work includes questionnaires and exercises already proven in Gottman's workshops.